Since the beginning of the semester, I’ve felt completely alone in this whole law school thing. Sure I have friends but I don’t have any good friends. I don’t have a friend I text or hang out with on a regular basis. I don’t have a friend I can go to about anything. I know as I get older making friends is going to get harder and I don’t need this huge social circle that is always busy doing things.
What I really want is one friend that I can talk to about my problems, life, etc. I want one friend that will make an attempt to hang out with me or will hang out with me when I make an attempt. So far, none of those. I know people have their own lives and I’m not wanting anyone to drop everything for me. Maybe my life is just boring in comparison to theirs and that’s why I’m lonely. Who knows?
Despite being lonely, I’m still happy. I still get excited for stupid things like my Cheerios with bananas in the morning. I still talk to plenty of people and socialize; I’m not isolating myself. Regardless, I hate feeling alone even when I’m not. I’m proud of myself for admitting there is something wrong and I need to change something. Admitting there is a problem is the first step to fixing it right? I just wish I knew what I could fix.